As a sober mom (8 years in January!) I am freaking serious about stress relief. I have to be, because I never, ever get to opt for the easy relaxation of a glass of wine or other substance to take the edge off at the end of a long day of crushing the game at home and at work.
No, these days I have to do way more time-consuming and boring stuff like meditate and exercise regularly in order to keep myself from becoming one of those frazzled moms in a stock photo whose kids are covered in like, spaghetti.
You know, this lady:
She’s just trying to talk on the phone and her kid’s on the freaking table! UGH.
But because of my commitment to walking around with all my feelings exposed like a raw nerve, I am now able to recommend to you the creme de la creme of non-alcoholic stress-relief gifts. I suggest buying them for your damn self before Christmas even starts ― this s**t is stressful!
1. Shiatsu Pillow Massager With Heat, $79.95
I have Amazon Prime, so I bought this for $49.95, but now that I own it I can legitimately say that I would pay upward of $5 MILLION for this thing. It’s second only to paying another human being to massage you.
Basically, it’s like a hard pillow that you lean against and it has four nodes that knead your back or neck or wherever you put it. (I’ll just say this: Butt stress is real.) Also, it heats up. It’s basically life-changing.
(Buy me the foot massager next?)
2. Bath Caddy, $69 and Dr. Hauschka Moor Lavender Calming Bath Essence, $25
A bath caddy will keep parents from electrocuting themselves while hiding in the bathtub from their kids, and aromatherapy oils or bath bombs make the experience of sitting around in your own warm filth feel luxurious. I like any of the Dr. Hauschka bath and body oils ― just dab a little on your temples and neck and breathe in to help release some of that “been-lifting-a-50-pound-child-because-I-refuse-to-accept-he’s-growing-up-and-will-someday-leave-me” muscle tension.
3. The Cor Aromatherapy Pendant, $125
You can find cheaper necklace diffusers, but the Cor pendant is by far the most stylish-looking and effective. The 14-kt gold version conceals a wick that comes in 3 essential oil blends meant to boost energy, focus or calm. The “Mad Men”-esque pendant is something I’d wear anyway, but I love that I can untwist it throughout the day and take calming whiffs of lavender or chamomile.
Get the pendant in rose gold or silver or buy additional wicks here.
4. Uma Wellness Oils, $45-$85